Friday, January 28, 2011

Just A Lottery Game?

I have started to realize that my posts are becoming just as infrequent as the How I Met Your Mother episodes, and sadly...just as lousy. I do apologize to all my loyal, faithful and sadly non-existent fans. You see, I have a goal, a place I want to be, something I want to do.

And I am no where I thought I would be, by now. In fact I do believe I am going backwards. Interesting aint it? There are so many questions I have right now, about where I am and what the hell I am doing. So many things I want to do. Like, I want to write a book. Not an e-book, those never sell, and if they are any good they are pirated right away. I want to write an actual book that is printed with technology slightly younger than the Gutenberg. I have even started said book.

But this is the point that really bugs me. I don't know how many people have asked this question, although I am sure they have. There seems to be some kind of fear preventing people from considering this possibility because the ramifications are nasty and crushing. Here it is, without further buildup...

I haven't tried to put this to words before, so do bear with me. You know how you see the successful people, could be in any Steve Tyler, Paul McCartney, Al Pacino, Bill Gates, Obama, or the kid everyone is talking about; Mark Zuckerburg. These guys are huge, everyone knows them.

But what if, there were a hundred Bill Gates, all of whom tried and failed. What if the only difference was just pure luck? Sure, Bill will say that he had determination, know how and a special feeling. The same way the guy at the end of the race will say 'I knew I was going to win'. My point is, we all listen to the winners. We all listen to what they say and believe that if we are determined, ingenious and do not give up on our dreams, then we will become successful. So I guess my question is, was the only difference between these winners and losers simple luck?

Look at the acting industry. There are hundreds of thousands of actors just waiting for their 'big break'. Looking at the music industry, what with the acts going on now, it seems to be more like picking random straws out of a hat and announcing 'you are going to be the next star', and suddenly little Justin Biebers are crawling like maggots everywhere. Talent? Skill? Fate? No, pure and simple luck.

I guess we have that thing that we want to do, and we believe it can be done. But what I don't know is, how many people have tried so hard to write that book, record that song, start that business and failed all because the stars just weren't aligned yet. I am not really a superstitious person, and I don't really believe in 'good' luck. I think chance is a better word for it. I mean, I think everyone on this planet has the desire to be on the top; one of the big investors, the Nobel Laureate, the Oscar winner... And with so many trying, it seems ridiculous to think that anyone could ever achieve this, with the people who do simply being the lottery winners, the ones we all want to be when all we are missing is a few numbers.

But I shall try. Because I am damned curious. It is like when you are playing a hand of poker, and everyone has folded but for you and one other guy. And he will raise and raise, and you will have nothing, but the only thing that keeps calling despite every fiber in your bones screaming out to stop, you will keep calling, out of damned curiosity. I am going to try. I am going to find a way, because I feel that I have a lot to give the world...we all do. And you can't blame the guy who tried, at least I will know that it was not meant to be, I will never have that thought burning in my brain...'what if'.

What if I tried?

Hardly Enough Said

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